Making Good Choices There are only 3 alternatives to every problem: Fix the problem. Move on. Accept that the problem can’t be fixed. Redefine it in a more positive way. Move on. Dysfunctional behavior: Anger, denial, blame, complain, make excuses, self pity, inaction, etc, etc, etc. Unable to move on. Perception of Event An event is neutral; neither good nor bad Perception of Event = “I’m okay. He’s mad.” AVOID RESPONSIBILITY Dysfunctional Behavior Behavior that hurts self or others and leads to problems in relationships: Inappropriate Rage Attack Accusations Rejection Self-righteousness Denial Blame others Complain Make excuses Self pity Inaction Accept that the problem can’t be fixed. Redefine it in a more positive way. Happy Fulfilled Learn and grow to help self and others Able to have empathy for others. Feels worthy of love, in spite of unfounded feed back that implies otherwise Problem remains unsolved. Unable to move on. Angry Unfulfilled Unhappy.